Couple years ago this thought ran across the head of mine. You my find it grossly offensive, but I hope you can take from it a little golden nugget... a nugget you may wish to dip in a delightful cup of honeyglaze.
Imagine if.
Mother Mary was an over-developed hermaphrodite. She actually had both fully developed organs – functional ovaries and functional testicles. After many years of “discovering” her unique body, one day a miracle occurred. She successfully inseminated herself using her own ejaculate. As most of you know when two of a like seed are mixed generally the baby is born with some disabilities whether mental or physical. Nine months later Mother Mary gave birth to this shining beacon of life – Jesus. Jesus however was different from a young age. As it turns out he was autistic. At the time however autism was nearly unheard of, so people were unaware that he had a mental disability. And so he lived his life to the fullest. He learned to hone in on his abilities, and began to impress every person he came across. Word traveled throughout the region. As the word of his abilities moved from person to person the stories became more and more extravagant. Impressed and curious people began traveling from far and wide to witness the amazing. Over time he acquired many followers, and so went the story of Christ, our savior.
Quit your imagining. I mean this can't be too much crazier than what the Good Book tells us today can it? I'm sorry, if you're steaming shake that shit out with a little chicken dance. Chicken dance, Chicken dance my darlin, Chicken dance.
1 comment:
I think its easier to believe that she was fucked by some dude. And because hookups in those days were frowned upon prior to marriage - it was kept hidden. Did marriage even exist back then or was it just wenches and men in robes who fucked boys?
As far as jesus having abilities? Well, If people back then could see david blaine - they'd probably want to murder him on a cross too.
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